Thinking of sandwich

Turning a year older, I would like to think I picked up some cool skills as I head off toward the twilight of my life. However, shaking hands is apparently not noe of them. I'm idling my car in an alley at midnight when my friends boyfriend comes over to greet me. He's a tough guy in the army with huge biceps. I don't really know him that well but he puts out his fist. Coolio, I can do that, fist bump and its all good in the hood. 10 minutes later we're departing so I bring up my fist again. But now he's got the hand out in the regular gentleman's position. Fuck me so I open up my hand but than we meet in this weird angle and now we're doing the bro arm wrestling grip. And you know, after that, there is anywhere between 0 to 8 different follow up variations that sometimes include back hand slapping or chest thumping. So I do this crazy 1.5 shake before I pull out cuz the longer I'm in, the worse its gonna get. I guess I picked up another skill tonight - never shake hands with a military man in a dark alley. No bueno.

Is this burger worth $13.95? My budget for lunch is about 10.00 so looking at the size of this, I have to ask myself, is it? Here's the thing, the "Napoleon" packs quite abit of ingredients starting with a 1/2 pound of ground beef and including bacon, smoked goulda, cheddar, carmelized onion, spring mix, topped with braised short rib, fried egg and truffle fries. You could practically eat 2 meals with this although I don't, every burger dies...but not every burger truly lives. FreEedom! Actually it was a little dry but I do give the cook major props for cooking the egg over medium (not everyone can do that) and making a fairly nice presentation wrapped in wax paper.

The Standing Room
Long Beach, Ca.

Not sure who this is but I like the short tie. I don't quite understand it and the only other occupation that rocks the short tie is a clown. I'm gonna go out on a limb and say Asian Nerd greater than clown.

Oh my goodness, marvel has come out with some solid entertaining movies including Iron Man, Thor and Captain America, always offering a strong focus on the character behind hero. But who see's a movie because its "solid". We want to see a movie that's crazy and Joss Whedon has done an spectacular job of highlighting each hero's power and personality. Loki, Thor's mischievous and lunatic step brother is causing mayhem again and has stolen the Tesseract (which suspiciously looks like the Cosmic Cube) to create a gateway to another dimension where an alien race of Chitauri are waiting to invade earth. Because that's what the Chitauri do, wait around space portals to invade planets. So the Avengers get together to stop this invasion but the build up to this fight is amazing. Highlights include:
- Hero vs. hero. Every time the comics pit their superheroes against each other, its always under some case of mystical spell of mistaken identity and its just a lame fight with excuses galore as to why one won. But Whedon lets them lose and Iron Man vs. Thor vs. the Hulk is a geeks' afternoon delight.
- The Hulk practically steals the show and you can see why he can kick everyone's ass.
- The Black Widow. Omg. Scarlett Johanssen is a top notch interrogator. Whaat? Thats what we're getting excited about? Ok, she looks super hot in her outfit. I don't know if that's her butt but that should have its own credit at the end of the movie.
- Agent Phil Coulson. He doesn't have any super powers but is the thread of humanity that makes the movie more relatable to the audience.
- End scene. Yes, there is one last scene after the credits. Its not a preview to the next movie but its a nod to Whedon's wit and love for schwarma?
As a kid, you bought the Avengers comic book because it had all the cool Marvel superheroes in one title. And as an adult, its the same reason why you should go see The Avengers movie.

Never have been to jail or close to being in one, I wonder what the prisoner is thinking when he needs to post bail. I mean, I guess one company is as good as another and jail doesn't have wifi so no yelp, so who to use, who to use. I guess why not Abba? They named themselves after everyone's favorite 70's pop band from Sweden, their van has a picture of a busty woman wearing professional clothing in front of a courthouse and they offer 20% off. Abba it is!

This is Ela Pasion. She's your typical import model, shows up in a lot in print ads as well. Good for her. I like reading interviews with models because it proves that stereotypes come from somewhere. According to a q&a, she has a tattoo of "sippy sippy" behind her ear because she loves to drink. Gee, I like to have sex too but you don't see me having "knocking boots" inked on my neck. She also is "afraid of snails" and got a "boob job" to get the attention of a guy. Just one guy? Oh man someone needs to put out a calendar of scientist and physicist.

Judd Apatow related movies like Will Farrell never do anything for me. They make me chuckle at the theater but like kissing my non existent sister I come away with some regret and bewilderment as to what made me laugh. There are never great lines to remember or skits to retell anyone. Hell, even a movie like Clash of the Titans had "Release the Kraken" and that wasn't even suppose to be funny. So Jason Segal and Emily Blunt are a happy in love couple, Tom and Violet. The live in San Francisco and after a year of a blissful relationship, he proposes and she says yes. But oh oh, she gets accepted to finish up her Phd in Michigan so they postpone it 2 years...than another 3 and by that time, hurdles come in their way. The thing is, the problem they encounter still would have been there, weather it be infidelity or lack of self esteem regardless if they were married or not. And I think the bottom line is, I could give a rats ass if Tom gets married or not. He's just this tall goofy guy who acts sympathetic but I'm not feeling it. This film probably would have been on my "hated it" list but I really like Emily Blunt, Alison Brie and Chris Pratt. Maybe if it was Mark Wahlberg, Will Smith or even Joel Mchale, I'd like it more.

Did I like the movie: Not really.
What I learned: I just reviewed this movie as an excuse to post a pic of alison brie.

Super*market use to be a show featuring skinny scrawny independent cartoonist and self published zinesters with emo feelings of angst. It was a good gathering for people to know they weren't alone. Oddly enough, it was always ran by happy shiny people, and exit my friend Jessica, enter Bubble Punch? They've put on shows before but looking at the vendor list, they were booths selling cute Japanese fashion accessories, vintage articles of clothing and gothic lolista type jewelry. Oh so kawaii...except some of the "stores" looked like stuff people were trying to get rid of from their garage. Me, I was selling cookies. I got the hook up from Jessica as a "long time supporter" so my booth space was free and cheap chinos love that! The show only ran for 4 hours so what's going on:

- lot of girls with brightly colored wigs or dyed hair jobs. I think I'm going to a rave.

- little chubby kid walks by and I can see him eye my cookies, his glance lingered for one second too long, long enough for me to read his mind. I know he wants these cookies, sure, we just ate lunch but I still want something to eat, whats with my mom looking at these stupid beads, let me have a cookie. Sorry kid, no need to start your diabetes early.

- My friend Sophia, helps out at the booth by baking and selling her own baked goods including cupcakes, fudge brownies and some cherrty fritter type of bread. She's worried no one is going to buy her goods. She's relieved 1 minute later when someone buys her cupcake.

- One thing about the costume type parties is that its easy to turn on the Charisma Shopkeeper charm because I can genuinely compliment someone for their hard work even if its garish looking. Actually a lot of them put in hard work.

- Although some bitches be all hanging out in their high heaven, prancing around to get attention but won't give you the light of day. Thats ok, free cookies are for my friends only or if you're under 5 yo. Which sounds creepy when I write this.

- Customer comes by and says she only has .50 cent. I sell mine 2 for a dollar but I feel bad for her that she wants to spend her only cash for a cookie so I break up the set.

- Late 30's white dude with a shaved head wearing a "Navy Seals" sweatshirt comes by. Did he bring his daughter or girlfriend, he seems out of the demographics of this show. Neither, he's actually from Canada and dropped by for the free beer. Sophia and I point him over to the other booth.

- We're situated right next to Debbie Downer. Doesn't seems like anyone is buying her possibly home made hair pins and she's just stands there looking sad. Nothing else, no chatting no smiles just standing harshing everyone's mellow. If she sold depression, she be the fair's blue chip winner.

- My chocolate chip cookies are pretty spectacular. I always get compliments and I can pat the cookies on the back because its not my secret recipe. Its the recipe from the back of the tollhouse chocolate chip bags I buy. Anyone can make em. Like you.

- I decided to expand my repertoire by making oatmeal which i get from the lid of the quaker oat can. I trade out the raisins for cranberries and add walnuts.

- The band Nylon Pink is suppose to play today. The cutest girl from the band comes by to look at our goods. She's the cutest because she comes by to look at our goods. I hook her up with a few free cookies. She's happy. She comes back 20 minutes and buys a bunch of cookies cuz she loves them! I'm happy!

- Show is over, it was only 4 hours. Would I do it again? I don't know, its not my crowd but I like listening to free music.

When old people are missing, you don't really see a lot of posters up. Pets that have disappeared get papers with their picture peppered all though the neighborhood while kids can see themselves on milk cartons and the internet. Who's looking out for the elderly? The police after 24 hours I guess but wheres the community grass roots version of looking for them?

Sam Worthington plays the reluctant hero but he's no Mark Wahlberg who's made a career of being a sad sack superher from "the big hit to the shoorter to the boxer. As Perseus, he just wants to be a fisherman and raise his son but sorry Sam, you are the son of Zeus so stop looking constipated and in disbelief because yous got to do some shit. Heroic shit because things are looking grim. Zeus is betrayed by Ares and Hades and consequently, imprisoned in this parker brothers labrynth while old time nemesis, the Titans are roaming the earth destroying a bunch of extras who never get their names on the credits. But as lackadaisical as Sam Perseus is, fortunately, Andromeda is ready to take names and demi god Argenon is looking for redemption. Its a motley crew helped by Hephaestus played by Bill Nighy who always brings life to his roles regardless of the amount of make up the put on him. This series of movies seem to take great liberties with Greek mythology so if you're a student, don't use these films as your cliff notes. Ugh, doesn't anyone still know what "cliff notes" are?

Did I like this movie: Yes
What I learned: "I forgive you...for this" isn't as epic as "Release the Kraken!"